Withholding the blessing goes beyond failing to release it. One of the things Jesus said in Matthew 10 when He sent out the twelve was, “Freely ye have received, freely give.” Likewise, as we have freely received, we should freely give. If we are to have the blessing, we should be a blessing. In order to bless, we need to be in a position to do so. When the disciples were sent out, they would not have been able to freely give, if they did not go. If they did not obey Jesus, they would not have been in a position to bless. Obedience is an issue of the heart, for that is where the decision is made to do so. Whether we bless others or not, begins with our heart. In order to bless others, we must first decide to be a blessing.
One way a person withholds the blessing is having a self-centered life. When a person is the center of the universe in his view, everyone else revolves around him. The only time he takes interest in others is when it benefits him. He may ask someone, “what’s new,” but ultimately it is with the intent to have the same question directed back. Essentially, his attitude is such that every blessing is to be consumed on him. When the center of the universe blesses others, it is done so that he may remain the center of the universe. Similar to the Pharisees in Jesus’ day, who gave in order to be recognized. In many instances, the self-centered individual gives to others out of obligation, or to ease his conscience. Unfortunately for him, there is no real joy in giving.
Another way people fail to release the blessing is by walking in un-forgiveness. Resentment toward others is like a dam in a river that keeps the water from freely flowing -it keeps the blessing bottled up. The desire to speak a kind word or to give a smile to those they hold in un-forgiveness, cannot be found. Oh, they might be polite and smile and nod, but there is no depth of feeling. Those who are the recipients of such polite gestures know it very well. If one is going to be in a position to release the blessing, one has to forgive. This includes the forgiveness of the self, so that one may also be able receive the blessing in order to give the blessing. Unforgivingness holds back the blessing!
With un-f0rgiveness comes bitterness, and those who are embittered are incapable of blessing others. Bitterness is a place where the decision to be a blessing does not exist. In fact, those who have fully given themselves over to bitterness will not bless others, because they made the decision not to do so. Basically, they have the demeanor the repels people from their presence. Those with a bitter heart do not want people around them; except perhaps, to complain or strike out. Generally, they strike out at people in order to repel them. They are not in a position to freely give. Those who are bitter are in need of deep healing before they can bless others. They too, need to forgive before the healing process can begin. Ironically, blessing others helps people to release the bitterness.
Those with deep wounds have a difficult time with blessing others because of the pain involved. Generally, those with wounded hearts put walls up to keep from getting hurt again. Therefore, they have a difficult time with getting close to others. For some, the intensity of the pain involved causes them to stay inward focused. They cannot see past the pain in order to discern another person’s need for a blessing. Again, part of the healing process is giving out of our own need. What a person sows is what a person will reap, and the amount received is predicated on the amount given. It may be that one is too emotional to be able to lend an ear to someone else, but he can still pray for the other. If you are in need of a healing, pray for someone else who is in need also. Let the healing begin!
Those who are judgmental and critical of others are generally incapable of blessing others. Those who are too busy fault-finding will be unable to find anything good to say about another. Those who murmur are unable to recognize a blessing, let alone give one. The parent who is always critical of a child will not speak words of affirmation -which is another form of blessing. Murmurers do not praise, while those who live a lifestyle of praise, bless!
What we take in affects our capacity to bless. If we take in the things of the world that feed our old nature, the capacity lessens. The old nature is self-centered! The attitude we decide to have will determine what spirit we are of, or reveal it. If we are walking by the spirit of the world, our concern will be ourselves. If we submit to the Holy Spirit, we will walk in the fruit of the Spirit. In so doing we become outward focused. If we follow the old nature, we will do what is contrary to the New. If we submit to the Spirit, we will not fulfill the lust of the flesh (Galatians 5:16).
To be who need to be for others, we need to be who we need to be for God. If we seek to bless Him, we will bless others. If we fail to keep our First Love first, we fail to be in a position to bless in the truest sense of the word. If one were to find himself incapable to bless others, repentance is in order.
