How are You Treating Your Wives?
Hey, husbands, how are you treating your wives? Have you read the passage of Scripture that says, “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it” (Ephesians 5:25)? How is that going for you? Are you loving her well? Have you laid your life down for her? Are you treating your wife as Jesus would?
There are husbands who constantly criticize their wives. Often, making them the butt end of their jokes. On top of that, they take glee in doing it in public, especially, in front of friends and family. Are you one of them? That is not loving them well. Every husband should keep in mind that before she became his wife, she was and is God the Father’s daughter first! That type of thing probably does not set well with Him. Even if she is not present, it is still wrong!
Why would some husbands do that? Perhaps, they learned if from their own fathers? If that’s the case, it’s time to break the family pattern. Do they despise their wives for some reason? There are numerous possible reasons, which range from unforgiveness to one’s general attitude toward women, and everything in between. Maybe, they despise themselves, and they mistreat them as a consequence. “He who loves his wife, loves himself” (Ephesians 5:28).
The more husbands mistreat their wives, the more their hearts close up to them. In this later case, those who despise themselves actually seek rejection from their wives, amongst others. Of course, some are not self-aware enough to figure out why their wives are not close to them anymore. It usually happens gradually, but eventually a large chasm often develops, and it does not end well. In fact, God’s intention is they don’t end until death do them part (see Matthew 19:6).
At this point, the focus will not be on reasons husbands self-sabotage. That is another lesson in itself. Suffice to say, every human, male or female, should love themselves as God loves them. It is the opposite of narcissism. It frees people up to love others well. Another lesson in itself. So how should husbands treat their wives?
Love Edifies
Ephesians 5:25-29 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it; That He might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the Word, That He might present it to Himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church.
Part of loving our wives includes considering her to be precious. Of great value. She is set apart to us, and no one else can stand in her place. She should be our second Love, because Christ is our first. Even though, God placed husbands in authority over their wives, she is still their equal. When God brought the woman (Eve) forth from Adam’s side, she was to be his “help meet,” or “helper.” Someone who comes along his side to help him. She completes his lack; she was not intended to be a slave.
By the way husbands, with authority comes responsibility. That authority is not supposed to be lorded over her; in fact, it should protect her. Yes, husbands should protect their wives. Not just physically, but spiritually and emotionally. By walking in subjection to Jesus Christ our Lord, that authority will provide stability for the family. In which case, she should feel safe.
In order for you to be who you need to be for her, and your children, you need to be who need to be for Him. If you are who you need to be for God, you’ll be who you need to be for others. The greatest way to love your wife, is to love Jesus first, and submit to Him completely. In turn, His love is free to flow through you to her. It is another way for her to experience His love.
That love takes joy in her for her sake alone! It does not look for a return on investment, so to speak. As we well know, it is not selfish! Let’s love our wives well!
