Table of Contents
Hurt and Anger
Show me an angry person, and Iâll show you a wounded soul. This is not referring to those who might get angry from time to time, but those who constantly flare up. Many of the angriest people you come across, are those with the deepest of wounds.
Anger gives people a sense of power, and they use is it to cope with pain. It easier to feel anger than emotional trauma. Moreover, they feel emboldened to keep people at a distance to avoid further pain. Of course, some use it to manipulate others.
You might notice an element of pride pared with the anger. Self-importance also rises to the top; but then, when someone has been wounded by others, they feel belittled or disrespected. They use anger to get that respect back. They want to be acknowledged, and itâs exactly what it does for them. At least, from their point of view. Unfortunately, it doesnât garner true respect from others. Truth be told, people donât respect them; although, some may fear them. Sometimes, they confuse the two. Of course, knowing others may fear them tends to inflate their ego.
When unforgiveness is involved, retaliation may join the mix. You may notice that a number of those suffering in such fashion, tend to retaliate whenever theyâre offended.
Suffer? Remember, pain is involved. Secondly, guilt can accompany their outbursts. So now, they are not only dealing with pain, theyâre dealing with the guilt of hurting others in the aftermath. Most angry people are not sociopaths (those who are antisocial and lack a conscience). Their antisocial tendencies are a means to keep society from hurting them.
Some are angry with God. A number of them claim to be atheists; even though, deep down they do believe in God. It is their way of retaliating against Him. Something painful happened in their life for which they blame God. They havenât forgiven Him, though, He has never done anything wrong that requires forgiving. Sidenote: He is God and we are not. He can do as He please, He doesnât answer to us, and does not require our forgiveness. Itâs a matter of perspective.
Romans 9:19-21 Thou wilt say then unto me, Why doth He yet find fault? For who hath resisted His will? Nay but, O man, who art thou that repliest against God? Shall the thing formed say to Him that formed it, Why hast Thou made me thus? Hath not the Potter power over the clay, of the same lump to make one vessel unto honour, and another unto dishonour?
How Long Will You Retaliate?
Maybe you know someone who fits this description. Is it you, perhaps? If it is, how long will you live a life of retaliation? Then, maybe youâre tired of it, and want to get rid of it. Itâs a matter of how.
Whenever you want something to quit producing fruit, you have to kill the root. You cannot simply pick the fruit, and expect none to grow back. Anger and wrath are the fruit. The unforgiveness is the root. Without forgiving others (including God), you will find no forgiveness, nor the ability to be rid of the pain. Forgiveness is an act of mercy, which is where healing can be found. When you withhold mercy from others, essentially, you withhold it from yourself as well. Unforgiveness inhibits healing.
You can always hang on to the pain and keep it as a pet (thereâs a lot that could be said about this, but weâll stick to the subject). You can let anger be your Rottweiler or Pitbull if you like. But that only leads to isolation and loneliness.
You Have the Power to Decide
Itâs all up to you. God has given us the ability to decide to forgive. âNot true! I canât let it go. Do you know what they did to me?â Jesus knows exactly what they did to you, and what you did to others. His hanging on the Cross proves the point. He is the only One Who has the right to hold others in unforgiveness, but how did He respond to those who sinned against Him?
Luke 23:34 Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.
God values relationship. So much so, Jesus gave His life for humanity that those who receive Him become the children of God (see John 1:12). Forgiving others is paramount for the believer, and those who wish to walk in freedom.
âBut I canât! Didnât you hear what I said earlier?â By Godâs grace you can. It gives you the ability. If you really want to forgive, or least want to want to forgive, there is a way.
Hebrews 4:16 Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.
By humbling yourself, and asking God for help, He will empower you to forgive. Furthermore, He will even heal your emotions if you allow Him into your life. At this point, we wonât address the how He does it, or the process He may use. We do not need to know how He does what He does, we simply have to trust Him.
