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The Lie That Sabotages the Journey
How many are on the self-improvement journey? Of that number, how many actually do not believe they’re able to improve? There’s a segment that’s been told they’ll never amount to anything. What’s more, they’ve also been told they’ll never change. From adolescence to their adult life they’ve heard, “I know you; you’ll never change.” And so the self-sabotage begins, which means they wreck any progress they make, especially when things appear to be getting better. These fall under the category of those always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Like mad scientists, they’ll go to any length to prove their hypothesis about themselves. The problem is that hypothesis was not originally theirs; someone close gave it to them. With that mind, parents beware of what you tell your children. They will believe what you say, especially in the formative years. By the way, that stuff goes deep. Of course, you can also help create a narcissist. With that in mind, here’s a question: Does the narrative line up with the Word of God? More on that in a moment.
The children who believe the negative narratives tend to find those narratives reinforced during their school years. How so? Behavior follows belief in many instances, which means they will act in ways that cause other children to negatively respond to them. Yep, they’re the last ones picked for the team. To be honest, kids can be quite cruel.
The bottom line is they believed a lie, and feel trapped with no hope of change. Their best efforts tend to lead to failure. Naturally, there are numerous exceptions: the high achievers. These decided to prove they are worthy, and the others are wrong. On the outside they look very successful, but they never see themselves that way. They’re never satisfied with success, because they actually do believe the lie. Because they’re trying to prove their worth, they’re driven. They are the lonely ones at the top.
Truth About Self-Improvement
Everyone can change for the better, which includes those who don’t believe it. However, true change for the better cannot be done through self-improvement. The reason is it’s about the self. Self-improvement tends to lean on the flesh, which means the vision for the future self is distorted. Additionally, those who embark on the journey still rely on other people’s opinions, which may not line up with God’s sentiments. Not to mention pride plays a big part of the process. Going back to a previous point: what’s behind the need to prove others wrong? Hmmm.
Proverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before stumbling.
For you who are on the self-improvement trek, how many self-improvement books emphasize designing your own future? How does that line up with the Bible? How many of those books include God in their equation? Have you ever heard of imposter syndrome? If you preclude God in your equation, chances are you will always feel like an imposter when you reach the proverbial top.
Proverbs 16:25 There is a way which seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death.
Let’s make this simple: the best version of yourself is conformed to the image of Jesus!
Romans 8:28-30 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose. For whom He did foreknow, He also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the Firstborn among many brethren. Moreover whom He did predestinate, them He also called: and whom He called, them He also justified: and whom He justified, them He also glorified.
A Way To Change
Mark 4:26-27 And He said, So is the Kingdom of God, as if a man should cast seed into the ground; And should sleep, and rise night and day, and the seed should spring and grow up, he knoweth not how.
Seed is a metaphor for the Word of God (see The Parable of the Sower in Matthew 13; Mark 4 and Luke 8). Growth takes place after seeds are planted, even though we may not know how it happens. This leads us to a major way to change: read the Bible. It’s not some religious, pious thing to do; it produces change. As you read and receive the Word, a metamorphosis will take place, which you cannot explain. That’s the grace of God working in your heart through His Word, which never returns void.
Romans 12:2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
Reading the Bible is part of the renewing process. The more you take it in, the more your thought process aligns with His. Your belief systems changes, and life gets better. That does not mean there will be no more challenges, but you’ll face them with Him. Confessing His Word over yourself is an act of faith when you receive it in your heart with belief. Self-affirmations mimic this principle, but it’s a worthless counterfeit if you don’t actually believe what you’re telling yourself. The subconscious part of our brain does not activate apart from belief, which is rather interesting. If you don’t believe, your subconscious will not respond; regardless of what the self-help books say.
Proverbs 16:1-3 The preparations of the heart in man, and the answer of the tongue, is from the LORD. All the ways of a man are clean in his own eyes; but the LORD weigheth the spirits. Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established.
Something to study: when reading Hebrews 4:12-13, we discover that the Word of God does heart surgery. When your heart changes, your life changes.