Affirmation is powerful. It’s something that helps shape destiny, good or bad. Without it, people don’t fare so well in life. When they come to receive the affirmation of God our Father through Jesus Christ, their life changes for the better. Without it, they’re limited in their capacity to live life to the fullest extent God desires for them. The devil knows it full well, and seeks to attack our identity in Jesus Christ by twisting the concept of love and affirmation. He employs the same method on us, as he did with Jesus in the wilderness when tried to tempt Him: “If you be the Son of God . . .” If he can get us to question our relationship with God, he will try to move us into the next phase of his plan: “If you’re a Christian, prove it!” This little nudge can move a believer from resting in the relationship to seeking man’s approval. We are called to love others as ourselves; not seek to be loved by them. If we are tricked into seeking man’s affirmation, we will lose sight of loving others well and become self-centered.
Jesus warned about seeking man’s praise. Matthew 6:1 Beware of practicing your righteousness before men to be noticed by them; otherwise you have no reward with your Father who is in heaven.
One aspect of seeking man’s affirmation is that it actually moves one from faith and into fear.
Faith works by love (see Galatians 5:6), and without love you cannot truly walk by faith. If you become concerned about whether someone respects, loves or likes you, you may become fearful of rejection. We are designed for relationship with others, and to affirm our love toward them as well. However, if we seek affirmation, our motivation for doing things just changed. Instead of doing things for others out of love, we may actually do things to earn their love. If you do things to prove you’re righteous, you step away from righteousness and walk headlong into self-righteousness. Our righteousness is the result of our position in Jesus Christ, and our works of righteousness are the result of the work within us. Ephesians 2:10 For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them. Have you ever had a conversation in which others find out you’re a disciple of Jesus, and suddenly it changes. They talk about their good works, and how kind they are to others? They take on an air of piousness. For some reason, it’s as if they have a need to convince you that they’re good. Have you ever found yourself doing that very thing? If you’re not secure in your relationship with God, you may find yourself tempted to prove that you are His by what you say or do. “If you’re a Christian, prove it!” Suddenly, you may find yourself doing things for show, instead of doing them as onto the Lord. Big difference!
There are three areas in which the enemy likes to tempt people: the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life (see Genesis 3:1-7; 1 John 2:15-17). That last one is a serious snare. Affirmation from man can really stroke the ego. The enemy knows that one well too. “You are so good!”
That sounds very affirming, but it can lead to pride which ushers one to performance for applause.
Instead of listening to Jesus and obeying His voice, you may find yourself seeking the voices of man’s praise. You may find man’s “Well done good and faithful slave” substituted for “Well done good and faithful servant.” That’s a move from being well pleasing to God to being a people-pleaser. It’s a form of bondage that latches onto either neediness or pride. It’s an easy place to be manipulated. Master manipulators are well aware of this. Galatians 1:10 For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ. If you want to go about doing good as Jesus did, you simply need to purpose to love people well. If you seek their love, you will never be Jesus to them.
